Thursday, 18 June 2015

Thinking Out Loud....

It has taken me some time to write this post.  I've thought about it over and over in my head for some time now, occasionally popping back here to type out a few words, but then I stop.........

I've never been one to write about thoughts and feelings, it has always been a place for me to share the things I have been getting up to.  I worry about what people will think, I worry about sharing too much, I worry that it isn't what people want to read.

I spent some time away from blogging last year.  Not intentionally.  I found it hard to know what to write about.  I struggled with time.  I found Instagram so much easier to share the little snippets of my life.  But the truth is, I missed this little space and I knew I had to come back to it.

I still spend a lot of time on Instagram and I have been taking little breaks every now and then from blogging but I've been trying to make more time for blogs at the same time and that is still something I'm working on.  Catching up with bloggers I have followed for years, but also discovering some new bloggers and I'm really glad that I have made time for that, as well as popping back to my own space to update you all on what has been going on.

I've been thinking about what direction I want my own blog to take.  I've been thinking about what direction I want my life to take.  I'm almost 28, I'm feeling as though I have achieved nothing with my life, although what I expect to have achieved, I don't know.  I'm in a job that I hate.  I don't feel challenged or inspired.  How I would love to be doing a job that I love, something I am passionate about, something that makes me happy, something creative and exciting.  Blogging full time would be incredible, but we all know that is pretty unrealistic and is just not going to happen.

I'm waiting for that sign (you know, like in the film P.S I Love You) and I'm hoping it appears soon. I dream of having my own little business.  A pretty little tea room with miss-matched vintage china, or maybe a beautiful scented flower shop, or even a gorgeous gift shop stocked up to the rafters with handmade gifts and home furnishings *sigh* who knows, perhaps one day.

There has been a lot of change and at times a lot of uncertainty in my life over the past year and no doubt that is going to continue.  I'm not sure what I'm expecting to achieve from publishing this, or even whether I will leave this live for everyone to see.  Life is a funny thing, you never know what hand you are going to be dealt with next.  Never know what is lurking around that corner.  For now I'll carry on each day as I have the last and see what the future holds.  But part of me feels as though I should be doing something more.  Exactly what, I'm not yet quite sure.

Love Gem x x x


  1. I appreciate your honesty, Gem. It's hard to admit sad feelings, yet alone write about them publicly! I hope you do find your happiness soon - no one wants to fill their days with an un-loved job when they know they would be happier in a variety of other pursuits. I hope you are able to follow your heart soon - your brand of joy is out there, you've just got to find it!

  2. Sorry to hear you're a bit unhappy, working in a job you don't enjoy can be draining. With regards to blogging and your dreams there is no reason you can explore them. I find having a balance between the 'dull office job' (although I do enjoy it) and the writing dream in the form of my blog gives me enough balance to be achieving what I want.

    If you want any help or a chat about getting your blog into the right direction for what you want and your dreams etc then give me a shout.

    Victoria x